The first recorded English use of the phrase “adding insult to injury” was in 1748, or shortly after the Charlotte Bobcats last won a game. I feel like the phrase works well for action movies; for example, Arnold Schwarzenegger beats a terrorist into submission (the injury) and then says, “you’re fired,” before launching the terrorist off of a missile that explodes into a helicopter (the insult). But it usually works backward in sports, especially when it comes to the Bobcats. The Bobcats are almost always insulted first and then injured, as was the case on Saturday night, when the Denver Nuggets insulted Charlotte by 22 points and then added an injury to Byron Mullens with about 3 minutes to go. I suppose you could also make the claim that the Nuggets added this insult to the previous injury of Gerald Henderson, who was unable to play due to a bruise, but that injury itself was added to the insult of the previous night’s eye-stabbing blowout to the Golden State Warriors. Injuries and insults: they’re like the chicken and the egg.
Either way, with Mullens’ ankle badly sprained and wrapped tighter than a Dexter victim, the Bobcats need to find someone else with a 46.5 TS%–about 60th in the league among power forwards—to replace him. The good news is they have such a person: Tyrus Thomas, who’s slowly making his way back from…whatever that injury was that he had. To tell you the truth, it’s been so long ago I can’t even remember (sorry if I’m adding insult to injury here). The Bobcats also have an immediate temp in Hakim Warrick. Warrick’s career TS% is in the upper 50s, which technically makes him overqualified to replace Mullens, but his weak rebounding rate and substandard defensive play make him perfectly qualified. Clearly, one of the Bobcats’ many managerial strengths is their ability to find and then replicate excellence.