I think Jerry Maguire said it best in the pivotal scene at the end of the 1996 movie when he said:

“We live in a cynical world. A cynical world. And we work in a business of tough competitors. I love you. You… complete me. “

Unlike Dorothy, the Bobcats do not have us at hello anymore (nor do they complete me).

I get more and more of a feeling that if I am going to look for a silver lining with these guys I’m going to have to turn into a cynical little blogger that has to be sarcastic and poke fun at the team’s failures in order to find something I can claim is positive to write about.

Then the guys give us a game like they did Sunday night against the New Jersey Nets. Now I am fully aware that the Nets are not exactly challenging, but for the Bobcats to have been competitive, and actually lead—for a moment I thought they were really playing good basketball.

Of course that Deron Williams guy had to screw everything up with his franchise record 57 points (darn him). Then again, Deron Williams is an elite player and was on the court with a bunch of guys that are far from elite. He should have been able to do something like that.

The Bobcats visit to San Antonio on Friday was the least successful one since Ozzy Osbourne peed on the Alamo.  And at least Ozzy presumably hit what he was aiming for. “I just think as a group we’re not shooting the ball well,” said Corey Maggette afterward, in a spectacular understatement.  The Bobcats couldn’t shoot heroin at this point, and Friday’s 37% effort was entirely representative of the team’s dead-last TS%.  For the season, the only two guys averaging more than 50% from the field are DJ White and Derrick Brown, who also happen to rank just 8^th and 10^th in shots taken.  And how about Eduardo Najera going 0-for-3 last night, with all three of his shots being 3-pointers?       Basically, the Bobcats are not only physically inferior, they’re also stupid with the ball.  Cheering for this team is like watching the “Run, Forrest, run!” scene in Forrest Gump, only if he’d tripped and the bullies caught up with him, and then proceeded to beat him until he went cross-eyed.

It’s tough to pick a turning point in this game; it’s like picking a turning point in the Tyson-Spinks fight.  But believe it or not, the Bobcats actually had a 16-12 lead after 5 minutes.  However, this is also about the time when it became apparent that Gana Diop—subbing for the injured Bismack Biyombo—was not going to be able to travel up and down the court for much longer without the assistance of a tractor.  Sure enough, with 3:41 to go he essentially expired at half-court, and with his dying breath he handed the ball over to Tony Parker for an unobstructed layup.  This was part of an 11-0 run by the Spurs that put them ahead for good.  This is also probably a bad time to mention that Diop outscored DJ Augustin 4-to-2.

I thought I’d use this All Star Break as a nice chance to gasp for air in this waterboarding session of a season and not write at all about the Bobcats for a weekend.  I didn’t feel like examining this team’s first 30-odd games of the year anymore than I feel like examining my own rectum.  But I was inspired by Gregg Easterbrook of all people.  For those of you lucky enough to have not stumbled on him, Easterbrook spews forth his recurring “Tuesday Morning Quarterback” column on ESPN during the NFL season, in which he peppers his pathological hatred for large football-centric colleges and drafted football players amongst random outer-space factoids and ponderous, in-depth critiques of terrible sci-fi shows that nobody likes in the first place.  He also loves to theorize, and does so with arrogant certainty—which is funny, because one of his go-to theories is that a team or a coach failed because they “angered the football gods.”  Probably the only reason I keep reading his columns is that he fills me with that sense of shame and disgust that I can’t get anywhere else during the Bobcats offseason.

Anyway, I was looking over one of the TMQ’s Easterbrook shat out towards the end of this NFL season, and it featured one of his typical pseudo-lectures, this one being on why football has become such a hit on television.  Here were his five reasons:

• Football is America’s most popular sport
• Football is a great DVR sport
• Football is live
• Women are acquiring more social and economic power
• Only men can understand flat-screen HD TV remotes

Wow! What a week for the Charlotte Bobcats.

Those of you that have read my rambling in the past know that I prefer not to go off on tirades on the current and very dire straits of the franchise. With that in mind, the above words are about the only thing I can really say. However, if I stop there this will not be much of a post.

So what in the world am I going to talk about if I’m not going to go off on these guys?

The future.

It’s kind of a bummer to have to go through a season of sucking (I’m still holding out a little hope that the guys will turn it around), but the benefit to that is a good shot at getting one of the top draft picks in next year’s lottery. With the number of talented players that are in the college ranks it is not hard to imagine which ones would be great fits in Charlotte.

So let’s do that. Let’s imagine who the Bobcats might get in the draft next year. Now of course it would depend on who comes out and who doesn’t, so for the sake of argument anyone the team could want will come out.

Also, I think we can look away from the guards. The team needs a big man more than it needs someone to spell Kemba Walker and D.J. Augustin. With that in mind, here are some of the big men that I wouldn’t mind seeing wearing the blue and orange in 2012:

I’ll give you three guesses, but if you need more than one then you must not follow the NBA or watch FOX on Sundays (or any other day thanks to syndication; love them reruns). What’s the answer? Easy—

Low expectations.

Whether you are the optimistic or pessimistic type it is kind of hard not to agree with that. Coming into this season it was pretty easy to see that this season was likely going to be a rough one for the guys. While all the young talent is something to be excited and encouraged about, the team has no definitive leader or focal point.

The good thing is that in time a leader can develop. The problem is going to be in figuring out whom it will be and how long will it take for him to step up. Hence the theme of the post—low expectations (go ahead comedians let me have it).

I would not want to do this often, and I’m glad it is happening in a strike shortened season, but I don’t mind having a year like this. It may sound crazy, but hear me out a little.

January 25th, that’s the deadline. Between now and then we have to make a big decision. Do we extend the contracts of DJ Augistine and DJ White?

DJ Augustin

DJ Augustin was our 9th pick just a few years ago and was supposed to be our point guard of the future, even though we had drafted Raymond Felton three years earlier (who was also our “future point guard”). We decided not to extend Raymond though and gave him a one year deal. Now its 3 years after we drafted DJ, and we have drafted another point guard in Kemba Walker.(but seriously, this time he is our future star…I think…3rd time lucky?) Last time we never extended Ray, perhaps because of the strong rookie season DJ had. Dejavu anyone? However, no two situations are ever exactly the same.

DJ is having an up and down year, but I think overall we would agree that he is having his best year yet as a pro. The myth that DJ was a just a scoring point guard has been answered in my opinion, even when DJ is having off shooting nights he is delivering assists. He seems to run the team a lot better this year. But remember, in accordance to the Bobcats slogan“prepare today, OWN TOMORROW” we have to think long term. I am not going to get into a debate about Kemba being the future of the team, that is not what this article is about. But, to get down to the point I think we should offer DJ an extension, at a reasonable price. The “Mike Conley” affect as I call it has inflated the price of point guards in the league. I think something around 19 million over 3 years would probably be a justifiable amount to pay him. There are rumors that he has asked for 23.5 over 3 years, thats not a stupid amount of money, maybe a bit over his worth, but kudos to him for trying. But lets look at this thing in the bigger picture.