“We kind of know that OKC is a test for us, we failed it miserably,” coach Dunlap said after the Bobcats were beaten by a number so huge that it needed to be written in scientific notation. He’s right about Charlotte failing miserably. This was their first test against a traditional powerhouse, and it went about as well as the first test of Ed 209 in Robocop. In a 114-69 obliteration, the Oklahoma City Thunder played the role of Ndamukong Suh and the Bobcats played the role of Matt Schaub’s groin. Other than OKC fans, the only people happier after this experience have to be the Baha Men, thanks to OKC’s relentless playing of “Who Let the Dogs Out” after every big play by the Thunder.
Of course, going into the game I wasn’t hoping for much; my Low Expectations Oven had been pre-heated to 400°. I knew Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook were going to be completely overwhelming, but I expected the Cats to be no more than “whelmed” by the rest of the Thunder. Instead, Thabo Sefolosha dropped bombs on your moms, going 4-8 on 3-pointers. And there’s no way on earth that the Thunder had only 7 blocks, I don’t care what the stat sheet says. Serge Ibaka had to have had that many swats alone, and trying to finish off a drive in the Thunder’s paint was like playing a carnival game; it was damned near impossible to finish anything. Hasheem Thabeet, looking like he’d just gotten out of bed/electrocuted, finished 5-6 and had a double-double. The Thunder were off and rolling to an easy victory nearly immediately, and not even Haruki Nakamura could have interfered.