According to Rick Bonnell, Tyrus Thomas didn’t even join the team on the latest West Coast road trip. I find this stunning, considering that coach Dunlap has shown he’ll still play guys who are willfully insubordinate (Ben Gordon) or who are willfully trying to eat their way onto a future season of The Biggest Loser (DeSagana Diop). As I gaze at Thomas’s image on my cubicle calendar, trapped in 2-D purgatory like Zod, Ursa, and Nod in Superman II, his hand held aloft—in all likelihood acknowledging to referees that he was the one who committed the personal foul—is that a twinge of pity I feel for the man?
Perhaps, but more likely it’s the twinge of my hands on my stomach as I try to suppress my own vomit. The road trip the Bobcats just completed was the worst one I’ve ever seen that didn’t involve Tom Green. How on earth the Bobcats found themselves trailing by 41 to the Sacramento Kings—who it should be noted were playing without the use of cyborgs—is a question I’d pose to Zoltar if I had a wish.