For most of last night, the Bobcats and Spurs played something approximating a game. But with about 3:45 to go in the fourth quarter, the Spurs took a narrow 10-point lead and un-narrowed it, resulting in a 24-point blowout wide enough to drive an El Camino through. This wasn’t exactly surprising, as the Spurs entered the game 15.5-point favorites with the biggest homecourt advantage since the Playboy Mansion—they’re 21-2 at the AT&T Center this year and have taken 17 straight. Still, it was a bummer to see a somewhat exciting game of cat-and-mouse quickly devolve into cat-and-severed-mouse-head.
On the plus side, San Antonio decided to rest Tim Duncan, sparing television viewers nationwide from having to listen to Spurs’ color commentator Sean Elliott endlessly express his intense man-love for “Timmy.” (side note: first Stacey King and now Elliott in back-to-back games—is NBA League Pass trying to get me to throw myself off a building?). Of course, that didn’t stop Elliott from hogging air space like it was San Antonio’s water supply with constant 1988 University of Arizona-era trash talk. He and King are the ultimate commentator trolls, and Elliott’s got to be the only man alive capable of making me empathize with DeMarcus Cousins.