My goal is to always remain optimistic without being completely unrealistic when I write my posts, but I have to say that the Charlotte Bobcats are making it awful hard to do that these days.

The scene from White Men Can’t Jump where Wesley Snipes is getting hustled by Woody Harrelson keeps coming to mind when I think of this team. I picture Wesley in a Bobcats uniform with his hand in the air going, “It’s pretty! It’s so pretty!”

Then Rosie Perez stands up and yells out (in her best Puerto Rican accent), “Oh no it ain’t! Go pay your taxes!”

For those of you that do watch the Bobcats I am sure I don’t need to tell you how bad things have been. I think the game Wednesday night against the Portland Trailblazers should be treated like Lord Voldemort in the Harry Potter series; it will be “the game that will not be named.”

We knew that this season would be a tough one, but this is starting to hurt to watch; 3-20 and in the midst of an 11 game losing streak following Saturday’s game with the Phoenix Suns. When will the pain end? When will these guys win another game?

Before we figure out the best chance for that let’s take a look at what these guys are capable of and how they stack up to the rest of the league:

  • 87.3 points per game (28th in the league)
  • 101.3 points allowed per game (29th—yes, there is someone worse!)
  • -14.04 scoring differential (do I need to tell you that’s the worst by far?)
  • 40.3 rebounds per game (25th)
  • 19.6 assists per game (20th)

Kind of a grim picture, huh? Let’s check out a few more:

  • 19.44 fouls per game (11th)
  • 15.13 turnovers per game (15th)
  • 5.87 blocks per game (5th)

So what that tells me is that our defense is not half bad; we just can’t score to save our lives. What teams have as hard a time scoring and couldn’t stop the local youth team from scoring.

Offensively we have a few good candidates. The Toronto Raptors and Detroit Pistons are both averaging less (about 86/game). Sacramento and Washington are included in this dubious group due to their high point differential (-10.64 and -9.6 respectively).

Toronto can be excluded; their point differential is just -6.46. Their defense isn’t rock solid but it is good enough to stop the Bobcats offense. That leaves Detroit, Sacramento, and Washington.

With those three to choose from the odds are better to get a win against the Pistons. The Pistons are the only other team that really does enough stuff so bad that their deficiencies could cover up for those of the Bobcats.

Charlotte has trouble scoring, and according to the numbers the Pistons have a real hard time playing defense:

  • 38.44 rebounds per game (worst in the league)
  • 3.64 blocks per game (worst in the league)
  • 6.72 steals per game (25th)
  • 16.3 2 turnovers per game (4th most in the league)
  • Lowest scoring team in the league
  • Only one 100+ point game so far

I hate to say it folks, but I think the guys will have a hard time beating any of the teams they play before the end of February. Boston’s defense is too tough; Chicago, Indiana, and the Clippers are simply too good; Philadelphia is actually leading their division; as for Minnesota—Kevin Love will not let the T-wolves lose to Charlotte. Toronto is a possibility, but that one will be tough.

Sigh. Good thing the strike has shortened this season.